antibody -- you're definitely against everyone
artery -- it is a structured study of fine paintings
benign -- this is what you become after you be eight
bowel -- includes and is limited to the letters A, E, I, O, U
Caesarean section -- a prominent region in Rome
cardiac arrest -- when you are caught stealing someone else's car
cardiology -- an in-depth study of the game of poker playing
critical but stable condition -- when you run out of allowance but you still have enough load in your cell phone for text messaging
critical mass -- the service that politicians attend prior to election day
CT Scan -- something that you do if your cat goes missing
dialysis -- an automated telemarketing strategy
DOA (dead on arrival) -- the state of your electronic gadget upon receipt when you get it from an online thrift store
dilate -- the ability to live longer
enema -- referring to someone who is not your friend
genes -- usually comes in pairs of blue denim
hemorrhagic pancreatitis -- a more sophisticated way of saying 'bangungot'
hemorrhoid -- nasty being from outer space
impotent -- means that you are distinguished
labor pain -- refers to all your work-related stress
lobotomy -- a very unimpressive way of referring to a medical procedure involving the brain; 'lobot' in my dialect actually means 'ass'
organ transplant -- a strategic relocation of your piano
paralyze -- coincidental lies
pathological -- having to do with the paths you take from home to work and vice versa
protein -- when you are in favor of the younger generation
red blood count -- typical if you are one of the descendants of Count Dracula
secretion -- the art of hiding secrets
terminal illness -- a sickness you acquire in one of these locations: airports, pier, train station
tumor -- when you need an extra pair
vital signs -- critical clues to how much your medical bill is gonna be
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